Twelve weeks into detox - that must mean I am about half toxed! I thought it might be interesting to make a list of my symptoms at this stage, as I did at the very beginning, and then again at the end of detox (if I remember!)
Bruising easily
Rheumatoid arthritis type pains in my joints
Forgetfulness
Weight gain - during but mainly after tx
Some improvement in my temperature control
Oedema
Sudden tiredness
Noise doesn't bother me so much anymore, I no longer need to find a quiet space to hide in.
I'm hoping that the above symptoms are the cirrhosis and nothing to do with the hep c, but it will be another three months before I know that for sure. A definate improvement from how I felt during treatment, although the memories of that time linger on. The treatment certainly slows you down and I don't feel 100% myself yet, but this is normal apparently and I shouldn't worry to much about it (they say). It's kinda like I know what I want to do but the body isn't quite ready to follow it through. Like feeling 95 in a 55 year old body. Or, the spirit is willing but the flesh is weak!
It was my three month post tx check up with Dr Sree today. Good news! Apparently my bloods are more or less back to normal, which is a good sign for getting an UND at the six month mark. Symptoms that I still have, such as the joint pain and oedema, I may have to learn to live with - a small price to pay - and is due to the cirrhosis as against the hep c. Dr Sree couldn't get over the amount of weight I had put on - 8kgs since I last saw him - and said we will have to keep an eye on that if it continues (thyroid problems? I didn't ask)
Perhaps swimming would be a better option than walking to help me get fit (easier on the ankles) I don't much like getting wet in the winter time but guess it might be worth a go.
I have rejoined the golf club as a full playing member as from the 1st October
and hope to play some holes this Sunday, weather permitting.
The date for my SVR (sustained viralogical result) is 7th January and I shall see Dr Sree in February for the results. If I get a negative or undetectable result at that time that is as near as I will get to being "cured".
All in all, I was very pleased with my visit to the clinic and remain optimistic for a negative result. the best bit though is that I am beginning to finally pick up the threads of my life and move on. Swimming, golfing, walking were not things I could even consider three months ago. So anyone still undergoing tx please take heart, things do improve although its hard to see your way through it at the time.
It's hard to believe nine weeks have passed in a flash when the previous 48 weeks seemed to take forever.
The results of the biopsy on my forehead only showed some sun damage (well, he gave it a long name, but that's what he meant). He said if there had been a fungal or bacterial infection it had gone. All I know is that since I stopped applying their creams and finished my treatment it has disappeared on its own. Well, it is just visible but I can live with that.
The results of the ultrasound scan showed nothing untoward either and my blood test gave the ALT a reading of 19, which is promising for an undetectable result in January.
My weight has stabilised and stopped increasing, thank goodness. I still have the achey bones in my ankles which prevent me from walking too much and I get the occasional headache, which I never got before tx. I still get tired when i try to do too much, but I have learnt to recognise the signs now and I just slow down a bit. I'll never learn my limits because its human nature to try to do as much as possible!
My hair has just started to grow again and I see that posh spice has copied my crop, albeit hers is a different colour to mine!
I am now taking a daily supplement of vitamin b and milk thistle to help support the liver, I still drink plenty of water and herbal teas. I try to eat as much fruit and vegetables as I can everyday. I eat fish again but it still doesn't taste quite as good as it did before treatment. Sadly, there is still no way I could play a round of golf just yet, but I'm still optimistic I will be back playing in the springtime.
I had a bad day last week, I wasn't expecting to and it took me completely by surprise. It was awful, just like being back on treatment again. It brought all those memories back into sharp focus again. It's quite normal apparently. Perhaps it was a sign that I had been trying to do too much so I rested for a couple of days and was soon back to my post tx self.
This is why I think it is important to catalogue what happens after treatment as well as during. It's like the convalescent period.
I have been doing some walking and the hill that used to make me breathless no longer has that effect on me, progress indeed!
I have put on the stone in weight that everyone dreads when treatment ends. I was only ever this big when I was pregnant with my first daughter! I see Dr Streedharan at the end of September so if I haven't lost any weight by then I will ask what I can do to improve my metabolism, other than walking - perhaps I am just to impatient!
My achey joints are just the same, unfortunately. Not bad enough to warrant painkillers, just annoying. They make me feel about 90 years of age, and if you saw me hobbling about sometimes you might think I was. Again, its quite normal apparently.
This week I have been on holiday, we didn't go anywhere like Mauritius or Portugal or Australia, but I feel 100% better than I did before the holiday. We just had a week at home pottering about and doing what we wanted to do away from the office, the computer, the phone and the routine of everyday life and it was bliss, long, long overdue! We went fishing one day, shopping one day and had lunch out, pottered about in the garden when the weather allowed and we even went to the golf driving range. I cleaned ALL the windows inside and out - a major achievement as I couldn't have cleaned one successfully a month ago. We bought some books to read.... I bought one that was top of the best sellers list thinking it would be good and when I got it home I realised it is all about vampires and werewolves - never knew so many people could be into that sort of thing. Anyway, I will persevere with it.
I have started exercising on the treadmill and doing a few weights. My ankles and elbows are still very painful, a bit like arthritis, or rheumatism I suppose, and I hobble about but the more I walk the better it is - until I stop :) That to me is a major achievement and means I can start to get fit again. The golf range was fun. I hit 40 balls and only mis-hit two, infact I couldn't believe how well I hit them, neither could Estee! Of course it will be different once I get on the course again, I expect it will all go to pot. I noticed I hadn't cleaned my golf shoes from the last time I wore them in early July last year - perhaps they remembered that I finished on the 16th with a birdie :) which at the time I thought was a very appropriate moment to put my golf game on hold.
Next week I have an ultrasound scan on my pelvic area and abdomen and another blood test to check my blood and also kidney function. I also have to see the Dermatologist the same week. My forehead is very much improved - obviously the more my immune system improves the better it has got. But I shall keep the appointment, get my biopsy results and hopefully he will say he doesn't want to see me again. Estee played an enormous role in helping me through the 48 weeks of treatment, how he coped I'll never know, and he is also an playing an integral part of my post treatment recovery. He never pushes me, well alright he does a bit, and he is always encouraging me to take one more step forward. I love him to bits.
So, I am discovering that there is life after tx. My health will never be 100% again, but who's health is?
The transition of the new me continues, and I do admit to struggling some days with something akin to an identity crisis. People ask how I am and Estee says she's getting back to her old self, but I'm not and never will do. I cannot be the same person I was before being diagnosed with hep c and undergoing 48 weeks of treatment. Post tx is a bit like recovering from a long illness, some days are good and sometimes I am just plain ole tired and grumpy. Probably alot has to do with the frustration of not being as well as I would like to be. I had hoped for a quick detox but didn't allow for the awful aches and pains in my ankles which see me hobble along like the old lady I feel I am some days! So that is frustrating my return to fitness. I do still feel slightly detached from everything and everyone but the feeling is not as strong as when I was on tx, its like its just there in the background, reminding me. Kinda like waking from a bad dream and not quite being able to shrug it off. Ghosts of the past perhaps.
My forehead continues to improve, indeed the redness has almost gone but I do wonder if it will leave a large, faint scar that never fades completely.
My taste buds have also improved and I no longer live on chips, thank goodness. All vegetables taste delicious again and I am getting a much more varied and nutritious diet.
My hair seems to be still falling out, and isn't growing very quickly either, but I don't mind the short crop style for summer, but hope it grows a bit before winter! My nails are still soft - after a lifetime and having unbreakable, strong nails, it feels odd.
It was wonderful to get the undetectable result but already I am worrying about the six month test. I can't do anything more to help the outcome except eat healthily and try and build my strength up, so I must try and put it to the back of my mind for now.
On the positive side I do have more energy than I did a month ago and I have managed to extend my bedtime until around 9pm instead of 7.30-8pm!
Two days later
Today I woke and felt as near my old self as I have done since 7th August last year, and my morning routine felt like it was my routine of old instead of wandering about for hours in my dressing gown and slippers..... it felt like there was a purpose to it all. Still got the achey ankles, but I have read that anti-d's can cause aches in various bones in the body, so can bone cancer but we arn't going down that route. So I am now anxious to get off these pills as soon as possible. I see the doctor about another problem tonight so I shall ask her the correct way of reducing these pills. I never have been depressed but they did help enormously with the side effects of the tx.
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November 2007